Tuesday, March 25, 2008
I usually don't post deep thoughts on the blog, since its main purpose is to keep all of you updated on the kids etc...but every once in a while I get a little deeper, and this is one of those days. The hard things in life and the resulting emotions and reflections are all part of our lives, too...it's just not "warm and fuzzy" stuff. It is rather heavy on my heart that the little one we lost in our third miscarriage would have been born around this time. It's times like these that make my arms ache for another little one, but the Lord has not yet seen fit to allow that. We choose to cling to the knowledge that His plan is always good -- is always best -- for me, for us, for our family, for our children...both the two precious ones that are with us and the three that we won't hold this side of eternity. I am so thankful for David and Abigail. I am so thankful for a husband who loves me and is such a comfort and support through these tough times. I am thankful for an extended family, both our blood family and church family, and friends, who love me and are there for support, too. I am thankful for a heavenly Father Who is all-wise and all-good and Who loves me even though I am undeserving. At times like this I am careful to remind myself of these things constantly...because it is a struggle sometimes not to be bitter, or to be resentful of others' joys, but rather to rejoice with those who rejoice, and to give thanks always. Praise God for His love for us, for His perfect plan, and for the strength He gives to be thankful and joyful, because I could not do it in my own strength. Our prayer is that every part of our lives will be a testimony of His love and grace, and that it all will bring glory to Him. Thanks for your continued prayer for us. And thanks for letting me share what's going on in my heart of hearts today.