Friday, May 25, 2007

Why I have been MIA for a few days...

Oh, where to begin? First, as I mentioned in the short post previously, the wedding was beautiful. (And I will do my best to post pictures this weekend!) Monday we drove up Mt. Rainier and, among other things, played in the snow -- sleds, snowballs, the whole works. We had a blast! Afterwards we went to Jared and Krystle's house for pizza... While we were there, Bruce mentioned to me that his heart was racing again (he has had a few occurrences of this over the last year, and a week or two before the wedding, he had told me that when we got back home from the trip, we should schedule him with a cardiologist to get it checked out). When I took his pulse, it was 150. Long story short, Tuesday morning we went to the ER and he was admitted with atrial fibrillation [AF] (layperson's explanation: the atria just flutter instead of pumping regularly, the ventricles try to fire in coordination with the atria, and the result is a rapid heart rate and an erratic heartbeat). They kept Bruce overnight and ran a bunch more tests on him, and discovered that the right side of his heart is enlarged (dilated cardiomyopathy, or DCM), which is what caused the AF. There is also a problem with his left ventricle. In the midst of all of this, we missed our return flight to Atlanta, but Delta was wonderful about getting us out as soon as the doctor cleared us to travel. We flew home yesterday. This morning, Bruce saw a cardiologist and we are waiting for a cardiac MRI appt, which is the next diagnostic step. The doctor can not give us any kind of prognosis until they know what is causing the DCM. There is a huge range of causes, treatments, and complications associated with DCM, so it really is a shot in the dark right now. Everyone in Seattle was wonderful -- the Lord took good care of us through a plethora of people -- my family, Krystle's family, the medical staff at the hospital, even the people who helped us reschedule everything from the airline tickets to the car seat rental to boarding Baker, and the whole list is much longer than that. So now we wait. While we all know that we are mortal and no one is guaranteed a tomorrow here on earth, something like this brings it really close to home. Yes, I am frightened at even the thought of losing my husband, my best friend, and (although the term is overused and cliched) my soul mate. I pray that his condition will be treatable and manageable and leave us decades upon decades to share with each other. Mostly, though, I am trying to ask the Lord to help me to say "Not my will, but Yours be done" and to truly mean it...a feat which is possible only by God's grace and through His strength.
On a side note, there is no way right now to know the cause for the DCM, the trigger for the latest episode, the treatment for the DCM, etc. In light of that, the reason for this post is not to solicit suggestions on any of the above. Please just pray with us and for us. Thank you for understanding!

1 comment:

Debbie Griffin said...

My soul, wait silently for God alone, For my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory; The rock of my strength, and my refuge is in God. Psalm 62:5-6

Love you and praying for you!